However, I am actually excellent at a few things. I think the top of that list is eating, which I do with a passion that might make you smile.

I've never met a cheeseburger that I didn't like. I could have a cheeseburger every day and be very happy. Along with my cheeseburger would be some very delicious French fries. Nobody can eat a cheeseburger and fries like me. I never know when I've had enough.

Along with that, I've never met a serving of Mac & Cheese I didn't like. I enjoy those buffets where I can eat as much as I want. I'm not sure who came up with this idea of Mac & Cheese, but they certainly deserve a Nobel Peace Prize.

When it comes to dessert, I have never met a dessert I did not love.

At one restaurant, when I order my dessert, I tell the waitress, "You surprised me and pick out a dessert you think I would enjoy."

Never once did any waitress bring me a dessert I didn't like.

Then, I have never had an Apple Fritter I did not enjoy. I can't remember when I first started eating Apple Fritters, but it's certainly been a wonderful experience for me.

I try to convince The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage that an Apple Fritter is actually a fruit. Everybody knows that an Apple is a fruit. Whenever I say that to her, she looks at me and says, "The only fruit I know is you, and you're a fruitcake."

When it comes to breakfast, I've never had a waffle I didn't like. There is nothing like a plate filled to the top with waffles floating in syrup. I love waffles, and I could eat them all day.

Recently, some health challenges developed, and my doctor said I was slightly overweight. I asked what that meant, and he just smiled, probably knowing I'd find some humor in it.

I then had a slight heart attack, along with an episode of shingles and even a case of acute bronchitis. All of that together redefined my health condition.

When I say redefine I'm referring to The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. She's usually with me when I see my doctor and knows everything the doctor says about me and my health condition. She remembers even more than I hear. I'm not sure she is remembering everything that actually occurred.

Because of that, she has now taken over the culinary aspect of my health. I did not see that coming. All of a sudden, my eating habits are being supervised by The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage.

I must confess that she is a wonderful cook. I don't think there's anything she can't cook or bake that doesn't taste delicious.

But now, because of my health conditions, she has developed a vegetable diet for me. Also, some fruits are involved. The main part of my meals every day is lettuce. Personally, I only love lettuce on my cheeseburger. After a while, I have come to the point where I want to say, "Let us alone." But I can't speak that out loud in case of reciprocation. Believe me, nobody wants to experience anything like reciprocation from The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. Still, I understand it's for my health, even if I joke about it.

I did not know there were so many vegetables in the world until recently. It seems she has a vegetable for everything.

There is one strict restriction along this line, and that is broccoli. No matter what anybody else thinks, especially The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage, I do not consider broccoli to be a vegetable. Disagree with me if you want, but I am unanimous in that.

I do confess that the lettuce salads she makes are rather delicious. No question about that for me. But as long as I've been alive, I have never considered a lettuce salad to be the mainstay of lunch and dinner.

For the past year, she has been very diligent about the "vegetable diet" she developed for me. As a result, I have lost around 15 pounds. When the doctor told me that, I spent a whole week looking for those lost pounds. It's funny, but I know it's a positive change for my health.

Evidently, her "vegetable diet" is working for me. I'm losing weight, and my blood pressure is under control. I never knew it was out of control before, but doctors are always right, so says The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage.

After a week of eating lettuce salads, I began to feel like a rabbit. Now I know what rabbits feel like when they're running around looking for lettuce. The only difference with a rabbit is the ears. They have big ears and can hear everything, whereas I have small ears and can hardly hear anything.

I remembered what the Bible says in 1 Corinthians 10:31, "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God."

Whatever my diet is, whether I like it or not, I'm going to do it to glorify God, after all, God deserves my praise.